EXCALIBUR FANTASY FAIRE (SMITHVILLE , TX )
– MARCH 2003
Connon told us about a Ren Faire
that was open for a few weekends in the spring, and was much closer to us than
TRF was. That sounded like a good day
trip for us to do, so we all drove out to Smithville, where the Excalibur
Fantasy Faire was. If I thought we were
going through small town Texas
to get to TRF, this was more so. We were
out on roads with no houses in site. But
Connon knew where he was going, and lead us here with no problems.
While most Ren Faires usually go
for the standard “medieval Europe ” feel,
Excalibur was different as they had a unified them and a storyline. Designed around the Arthurian Legends (as if
the name of the place wasn’t a give away), the Knights of the Round Table would
try to bring peace to the lands by defending Morgan Le Fey. At the top of the hour, there was a short
(few minutes) sequence that advanced the tale a little more, and culminated in
a grand battle (demonstration event) at the end of the day. I liked that concept, as it gave some
variation for those that worked at the Ren Faire. (The rest of the time, the troupe wandered
around the grounds, and interacted briefly with the attendees.)
In addition to the vendors of food
and things, there were smaller groups that wandered around to interact with
guests, or just to provide amusement.
The knight “galloping” by, followed by his servant making a clacking
sound we found highly amusing. For those
that don’t get the reference, watch the first few minutes of Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy
Grail, and you’ll get it.
There were shows to watch, and we
made sure to hit a number of those as we went along. Sometimes the shows, strangely enough, found
us. The following was a great example of
such, and I wish there was a picture record of it. Unfortunately as I was involved in it, it was
hard to pull the camera out.
Additionally, I was separated briefly from the group, and it was Connon
who figured out what was going on. He
didn’t have a camera hidden anywhere within his kilt, and I think he was more
amazed at what was going on.
I was heading back from the
restroom when I passed Morgan Le Fey, and her minions. There were
half-a-dozen goblins, and a troll bringing up the rear. The goblins of
course were shorter people, hunched over, wearing green make-up, and acting
like poor Ferengi. The troll was a large, line-backer sized person in
similar green make-up. While all had
leather jerkins on, the troll carried a large (four-foot-long shaft) war hammer.
I watched the train go by, and then
the troll snarled at me. Being fun, and getting into the feel of the
event, I immediately growled back at him. The troll stopped to face me,
and we proceeded to snarl back and forth at each other. If we were at a
Star Trek convention, then we would’ve appeared like two Klingons greeting each
other.
Morgan Le Fey then took notice, and
commented this was an “interesting distraction.” The goblins quickly
encircled me, each making little hissing sounds. I crouched down with my
hands up in a defensive posture, and make a quick side to side motion with my
head as I bared my teeth at the goblins. I then looked back at the troll,
and stared him in the eye. I remained still, but did that subtle “come at
me wave” Morpheus did to Neo in The
Matrix. The troll hefted his hammer, and smacked it in his palms.
At this point, other guests had
stopped to see what was happening. Out of the corner of my eye I saw
Connon looking surprised as I was being ganged-up on. Looking at the
troll, I gave a quick smile to convey that I knew this was all “in-character”
and in fun. He gave a brief smile which acknowledged that, and did a
similar nod towards Morgan Le Fey. This wasn’t part of the day’s
“programmed show,” it was a random occurrence, and the actors at the faire need
to stick to the script. Besides, it’s probably bad form to look like a
guest was being accosted.
Morgan Le Fey then told her minions
to come along, as “there wouldn’t be much sport with a lone opponent.” I
retorted that only the troll would provide any sport to me, and gave another
smile. I could tell the guy playing the troll was trying to hold that
“mean exterior” and not laugh. The troll then turned away with a grunt,
and joined Morgan Le Fey as she strolled away. The goblins followed, and
I could hear a few muffled chuckles. I’m quite sure once these guys got
to a “backstage area” (out of sight of guests) they all had a good laugh about
it.
I didn’t see Connon around.
No, I didn’t expect him to “back me up in this fight,” but I wondered
where the hell he went. Turns out he ran back to where the group was
sitting to tell them I was being attacked by a band of goblins. No one
believed him, or apparently took him seriously. A few moments later I
rejoined my friends and filled them in on my little “encounter.”
During the rest of the day I looked
around for the troll again, because I wanted to comment to him that I enjoyed
our meeting. I didn’t see him again. We went from shop to shop
looking around for him, hoping to encounter him. Brian found a place
which was selling sword canes, and bought one with a cobra motif for a handle.
That looked pretty cool.
We ended up having a great day
here. The location may’ve been a little remote for location, but it was
pretty close as far as distance was concerned. While I looked forward to
going back to TRF in the fall, I wanted us to come back here again next spring.
I could hit a Ren Faire twice a year, I think that would be awesome. Most
of my SCA garb doesn’t fit me any more, but now was the time to start
rebuilding it piece by piece so I can blend in with the crowds at bit more.
SCARBOROUGH FAIRE (WAXAHACHIE ,
TX ) – MAY 2003
This is the tale of Sir Connon, a
kilted warrior who sought renown. With
his trusty blade handy, Sir Connon cautiously made his way through the cedar
woods. He’d heard a damsel’s cry of
distress, and investigated.
Sir Connon came upon a maiden tied
to a tree. There was no evidence of
brigands or even a dragon nearby, so Sir Connon was not sure how this lady came
to be in this predicament. He sensed
there could be a trap, and moved closer.
“M’lady,” he announced. “I am the
honorable warrior. How did you come to
be fastened this way?”
“An evil sorceress did this. Please free me,” she pleaded. “I await your rescue.”
“Then free you I shall.” Sir Connon went to undo the bonds. Something flashed before his eyes, which
caused him to become disoriented. The
next thing the kilted warrior knew, he was now prisoner and his precious blade
at his neck. The lady gripped his sword
knowingly, and smiled in a manner unbecoming of a proper lady.
“I’ve tricked you, Sir Connon,” she
said. “You’re mine to do with as I
please. I’m really the sorceress Shari of the Vale.
I have a task for you to perform, and no amount of sniveling will
release you from it.”
Sir Connon was brave, so he told Shari that what she wished he would perform with all the
skill he had available. She told him the
highland clans were forming a united force to free the realm from the tyrant
who ruled with an iron glove. If Sir
Connon joined her crusade, he’d gain much renown, as well as something she’d
give only to him. Sir Connon was
powerless to free himself, and knew this was his only chance to escape, but an
opportunity to be part of the united clans was something he couldn’t ignore.
“You need not have tricked me,
m’lady,” said Sir Connon. “All you
needed to do was ask, and I would’ve gladly joined my brothers in battle for
freedom.” And with those words, Sir
Connon marched with his clansmen off to war.
At the conclusion of the battle,
the rightful ruler was restored to the land, and Sir Connon was surprised to
learn this was Shari . Now adorned in her regal vestments, Shari gave Sir Connon the promised reward.
“I lost my kingdom because I had no
captain of the guard to help me defend it,” she said. “I make that offer to you, Sir Connon. Come, be my personal protector, and help stay
at my side.”
Sir Connon responded without
hesitation. “M’lady,” he said. “I shall do so. I have achieved great renown fighting to
regain your throne, and now I look forward for the opportunity to serve you
ever more!”
With the ever vigilance of Sir
Connon, and wise rule of Lady Shari, the land prospered like it never had
before. So ends the tale of Sir Connon.
We did these pictures while we were
getting ready to go to the Scarborough Renaissance Festival, which was located
south of Dallas in the small town of Waxahachie . Chaz and Lily had located a camp ground near
there, and had the idea that we’d make a weekend trip of this. Since not all of us would be able to get out
of work at a reasonable time (and it was a three hour drive from Austin ), Chaz and his
family would go up Friday night and secure the location. Connon, Shari ,
Brian, and I would drive up early the next morning and meet them there, which
at that point we’d all go to the Ren Faire together.
It stormed the night before, so
Chaz never even made it to the camp grounds (they took shelter in a
motel). They called the next morning to
let us know the weather report was for it to be very hot and humid today. Connon and Shay dressed for the event, so
Connon could be part of the parade which went along the grounds. I was slowly finding pieces to rebuild my SCA
garb, and decided to dress for comfort. Scarborough is spread out over a large area (although
it’s not as big as Texas Renaissance Festival), and many trees were there to
provide shade. The day was still
overcast, but we could still soak up too much sun if we weren’t careful.
We went from place to place, and
saw many shows and demonstrations.
Because it was warm that day, we made sure to drink plenty of fluids, and
took rest breaks when the opportunity presented itself. Sometimes we watched the joust or the single
combat matches. Other times we took a
moment to nibble a bite to eat. I liked
this vendor of “hanging chairs,” as they were very comfortable.
All during the day I’d been looking
around for something to get my gal pal Amy (as it was her birthday next month),
and hadn’t seen anything that “jumped out” at me. Towards the end of our time here, I mentioned
I’d seen something a short distance back, so was going to go get it. Shari
decided that she’d tag along, in order to get “woman’s view” of what I thought
would be a good gift. It passed Shari ’s okay.
Nearby was a place which was doing tarot readings. Since Shari
and I are both into reading the cards, she said it would be fun if we had
someone do our fortune. Sure, it sounded
like fun, and they weren’t going to leave without us (Shari
drove, and she had the keys).
Keep in mind that while Shari and
Connon are a couple, Shari and I have a
sibling-like relationship. Not sure how
that came about, but we’ve hit it off since day one. When we went to the tarot booth, and were
asked what we wanted the reading on, Shari
piped up “relationship stuff.” The cards
were shuffled, and laid out one by one.
I’ve seen enough carnival
charlatans do “fortune telling,” so I knew how the scam went. The person doing to the reading will make a
couple vague remarks, and the repentant responds by saying how that fits with
something specific in their life. People
like to divulge information about themselves to anyone who asks, and that’s how
these things work. Having your fortune
told at a fair should always be done “for fun” and not taken seriously. Someone who can do real divination doesn’t
need to ask you anything to give you a good reading.
That being said, as the teller
explained what each card represented (and she paused to await my responses), I
just nodded and made a couple “un-huh” gestures. Shari did
the same. We wanted to see how well the
person did. Much of the fortune was
dealing with the “closeness of a relationship,” “mutual feelings built upon a
good foundation,” and “how well we complimented each other.” Some of the comments made seem to point me in
a direction which was not Amy, and I could see what the reader was getting for
her results.
At the conclusion of the reading, I
looked at Shari with a smile and said “Well,
sis, that’s a pretty interesting outcome.”
The fortune teller’s face got
rather red, as it was obvious she assumed we were a couple. Still, I had fun getting the reading, as it
was strictly for entertainment purposes only.
Shari and I had a good laugh about it
as we were heading back to rejoin the rest of the group.
We had a full day at the Ren
Faire. Even though I had my camera in
easy access, I just wasn’t in the mood to take a lot of pictures. We all enjoyed our time there, but came to
the same conclusion. We preferred TRF
over this one. While the drive is about
the same, we’ll go to that one in the future.
Scarborough is perfectly located for those within the Dallas -Fort Worth metroplex to
come and visit.
We ate some fast food for dinner,
and went to the camp to spend the evening.
At that point we realized it was an RV camp, not a “camping”
location. We’d still brought tents with
us, but there weren’t any other amenities.
The lake we were near had signs posted not to go swimming, and the air
was so still that evening that it remained hot.
I decided I wasn’t going to swim, but would go over to boat launch and
wade in to immerse myself in the cooling water.
Connon came with, but only as my spotter. He didn’t think the weather was too bad.
The latrine of the camping area
looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in a month, and smelled that bad. Shari
reported the ladies side was no different.
Chaz’s family had their own tent, and the rest us packed into a pair of
two-person tents. Inside, without the
air moving, it felt so stuffy to me.
There was no way I’d be able to get any sleep that night. I just grabbed my sleeping bag, and plopped
down in the bed of Shari ’s truck. I doubted it would rain that night, and I’d
take a few biting bugs over an oven of a tent.
Either there were no bugs out that night or I was pretty exhausted,
because I was out like a light.
The drive back to Austin was nice, as Connon and I sat in the
back of the truck and talked gaming-related things, as well as personal
stories. There weren’t a lot of good
places to stop and get food though. The
camp ground (which I never even knew the name of) was pretty nasty, and
wouldn’t want to go back. But if I was
in the vicinity of DFW again, I’d give Scarborough
another visit.
For current information on the places visited:
Excalibur Fantasy Faire: http://www.excaliburfaire.com/
Society for Creative
Anachronism: http://www.sca.org/
Iris & Rose (“Wild &
Thorny”): http://www.iris-n-rose.com/
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